A nice long Round by current standards, with a bit of amusing confusion about when the Round started as well as whether a ball could consist of two spheres. NEWSFLASH: In the last Summary, the Judge actually calculated the time of the winning Rule 74:10 according to the Date: of the Judgement message. Fortunately this does not affect the win. The time has been corrected below. The Theme of Round 74 was "The Mad Scientists and their Monsters". The Judge was Swann, the Wizard was Doug. Times are GMT -0500, Eastern, the Judge's zone. Player Last Rule Style ---------------------------------------------------- Ed Murphy 74:11 +1.5 Jeremy D Selengut 74:3 +0.0 John M. Goodman II 74:9 +3.5 Joshua Hall-Bachner 74:10 +2.5 Winner and new Judge Stephen R. E. Turner 74:2 +1.0 William M. Maciejewski 74:12 +4.5 New Wizard Poster Rule Validity Style Time Posted ------------------------------------------------------------ William Maciejewski 74:1 VALID +1.0 Fri, 28 Feb 1997 14:11:10 Stephen Turner 74:2 VALID +1.0 Fri, 28 Feb 1997 14:45:10 Jeremy D Selengut 74:3 VALID +0.0 Fri, 28 Feb 1997 16:15:30 John M. Goodman II 74:4 VALID +1.5 Sat, 1 Mar 1997 21:49:41 Joshua Hall-Bachner 74:5 INVALID +0.0 Sat, 1 Mar 1997 23:24:46 William Maciejewski 74:6 VALID +1.5 Mon, 3 Mar 1997 12:10:09 Joshua Hall-Bachner 74:7 VALID +1.5 Mon, 3 Mar 1997 20:01:38 William Maciejewski 74:8 VALID +1.0 Tue, 4 Mar 1997 11:56:02 John M. Goodman II 74:9 VALID +2.0 Tue, 4 Mar 1997 16:38:21 Joshua Hall-Bachner 74:10 VALID +1.0 Wed, 5 Mar 1997 09:13:26 Ed Murphy 74:11 INVALID +1.5 Thu, 6 Mar 1997 22:55:58 William Maciejewski 74:12 INVALID +1.0 Fri, 7 Mar 1997 17:45:13 Rule: 74:X Poster: Jeremy D Selengut Validity: UNSUCCESSFUL (Posted before start of Round) [I have reformatted a little extra because of a few long lines.] >I'm sure this is not what the Judge intended, but in the spirit of mad >scientists and their monsters, perhaps it is a good time to recall the madness >and monstrosity of *shudder* round #74 which threatened to destroy the FRCee >once and for all. > >I won't require it, but I think it would be a good idea to include the >entirety of the transcript of that round, in its chronological order without >any gaps or omissions. So I will require that if any part of that transcript >is included in a rule it should be chronological and without gaps relative to >any previous rules. > >It would be well to remember that at the start of that round the R.O.'s were >identical to our present FRC R.O.'s (although things got seriously out of >whack as the round progressed) > >It started out innocuously enough: > >] From: "Steeven Swiniarski" >] To: "Fantasy Rules Committee" , >] "Joshua Hall-Bachneer" >] Subject: Re: I believe the round is over >] Date: Thu, 27 Feb 1997 00:29:11 -0500 >] >] Since Bill seems upset about how he was eliminated, I'll hand off the >] first rule to him-- and start off round 74 at noon on Wed 28 (Eastern). If >] he dosen't post one 24 hours after that, it'll be open to everyone. >] >] I think I'll suggest a theme(s) again inspired by extra FRCee nomic events, >] "Constitutional Amendments " >] >] Lets see if we can make it past 12 rules :) >] >] Swannee >] >] >] From: "Jeremee D. Selengut" >] To: "Fantasy Rules Committee" >] Subject: Rule #1 >] Date: Thu, 27 Feb 1997 14:03:57 -0500 >] >] -----Begin Rule----- >] All valid rules must include one and only one proposal to temporarily >] amend the R.O.'s. Furthermore, all valid rules must contain votes on all >] such proposals not yet voted on by the author of that rule. >] >] Temporary R.O. Proposal #1 (TROP-1): >] The following text will be added to R.O. #9: "Votes on temporary R.O. >] amendments may not be changed once properly communicated to the FRC." >] >] I vote FOR this amendment. >] -----End Rule----- >] >] >] From: "Steeven Swiniarski" >] To: "Fantasy Rules Committee" >] Subject: Judgement of 74:1 >] Date: Thu, 27 Feb 1997 16:29:23 -0500 >] >] Judgement of Rule 74:1 from Jeremee: >] No problems as far as I can see, compact, on theme and self-consistent, >] but I'm not looking forward to Judging this round, no sir! Pretty dry >] stuff, though, Style = +1.0 >] By the way, I vote for this amendment as well. Rule: 74:1 Poster: William Maciejewski Style: +1.0 Validity: VALID >This is Theodore Thacklethorpe, broadcasting from Acme Arena, where the >First Annual Monster Tournament is about to begin. The teams are taking >the field now, with each Monster being accompanied by its creator and coach, >a Mad Scientist. > >For those who are just tuning in, here are the rules of the game: > 1. Each team is composed of one Monster and one Mad Scientist. > 2. Monsters and Scientists may use any special powers or equipment > available to them. > 3. There is one ball on the Field at any time, although the ball's > composition, size, etc. may be changed at any time (given the > proper special abilities). > 4. Each team has a home goal, and a point will be awarded to all other > teams when the ball enters a team's goal. > 5. Since much time and energy and deviousness has gone into creating > the Monsters (and the Scientists, for that matter), teams shall not > attempt to kill one another. > >The other rules will be explained as situations arise during the game. >We'll be back right after these messages from our sponsors with the first >play of the game. VALID: (Can someone explain to me how you can post an invalid first Rule?) Takes the theme into an area that the Judge wasn't expecting, and sets up an interesting arena (pun intended) for future rules. I want to see where this will lead. STYLE +1.0 Rule: 74:2 Poster: Stephen Turner Style: +1.0 Validity: VALID >The first team consists of a mad scientist called Ian, and a harmless-looking >sheep called Dolly. Their only special ability is to clone the ball, using >their patent Banach-Tarski Cloning Machine which they always carry, and turning >the ball into two or more copies of its former self. This often confuses the >opponents, as the whole ball has to enter a team's goal to count for a >score. The team immediately turn the ball into two spheres. > >The next three valid rules will describe the remaining three teams, one per >rule, together with an initial game action made by that team. VALID: At first I thought this conflicted with 74:1, but its restriction is only that there is one ball on the field at all times, it doesn't say "only one" so, presumably, there can be an abitrary number of balls, one or greater in number; and 74:1 explicity allows modifications of the ball (though I believe it would forbid destruction of the ball.) I like the restriction, it gets some more teams on the field, and gets the game (and the Game) going. STYLE +1.0 Swann [Stephen Turner later explained:] >Dolly is a reference to a Scottish sheep, announced this week to have been >cloned from the DNA from adult cells of her mother/twin. I assumed, possibly >wrongly, that it would have been as major a news story all round the world >as it was here. [Being particularly dense and out of touch with the news, I needed further private explanation from Harlequin. Since whoever reads this in the future is probably also out of touch with February 1997 news, I include:] >At 06:56 PM 3/1/97 +0100, Orjan Johansen wrote: > >>Now the remaining question is: Who is Ian? > >The scientist who created Dolly. >/-------------Joshua Hall-Bachner-------------Chaos Harlequin-------------\ Rule: 74:3 Poster: Jeremy D Selengut Style: +0.0 Validity: VALID >My interest was immediately drawn to the bearded man standing in the middle >of the arena all by himself. Consulting my program I concluded that this >must be none other than James Clerk Maxwell, the 19th century scientist, no >doubt madder than hell at being resurrected for this absurd spectacle. > >But where was his monster? Should he be disqualified? The program listed >it only as "Maxwell's Demon." Whipping out my handheld web browser I found >all the information I needed at: > > http://www.pomona.edu/pynchon/entropy/demon.html >and > http://www.chem.uci.edu/instruction/applets/demon.html > >Thus I was able to understand the strange way that occasionally a ball or >player, when moving fast, would suddenly reverse direction as if it had hit >an invisible wall. Maxwell's invisible demon was defending his goal and >apparently I was the only one who knew how he was doing it! I was so proud >of myself I declared that all future rules which refer directly or indirectly >to a real person, event, object or process not previously referred to in >this round must include at least one web reference to one of these things. > >-----End Rule----- > >P.S. any FRC member who does not have access to web browsers or readers >and wishes have access to these services for the purposes of this round >should just email me with a request for the text of pages referred to >or for the results of searches for needed references. ;-{)> VALID: Obeys 74:1 and 74:2, though I don't know if I particularly like the restriction. Historical refrences are fine, but insisting on the use of the web seems to me to disenfranchise Players w/o easy web access. STYLE +0.0 Rule: 74:4 Poster: John M. Goodman II Style: +1.5 Validity: VALID >This is JGOO giving you the play by play for the '97 monster games. > >Now joining the field is Dr. Fred, and his infamous tentacle. Still with >the heigtened intelligence gained from drinking Dr. Fred's polluted water, >but without the intention of taking over the world, they are likely to be >more of a challenge than one would expect. >(http://www.macweek.com/mw_1001/tentacle.html) >Dr. Fred is still armed with his Chron-o-john, though whether it will >continue to function is mere speculation. >But wait, it seems Dr. Fred is powering up his chron-o-john... and suddenly >the field is filled with hundreds of purple tentacles--no, they are all the >same tentacle, but from hundreds of different points in the future. >Apparently the Chron-o-john is working (perhaps Dr. Fred is no longer using >second rate diamonds). > >Surrounding Ian and his sheep by his mere numbers, the tentacle is >attempting to incapacitate them while Dr. Fred manevures the ball towards >their goal. Will he make it? > >All future rules must explain a unique attempt at a goal, as well as the >outcome of the goal attempt in the previous valid rule. Ok, This is consistent with 74:1, since all the tenticles are "one monster" and it follows 74:3 with both a "real person, event, object or process not previously referred to in this round" and a link to an explicitory page. It has a teem and a game action as per 73:2, so it's VALID. Style: bonus points because I loved Maniac Mansion-- but it loses some because the rule does not take into account the dual "ball." While "manuvering the ball" is a valid game action, the action should (IMO) refer to the manipulations the ball's already undergone. Some of that is made up for with the restriction, which keeps the game going. STYLE +1.5 Rule: 74:5 Poster: Joshua Hall-Bachner Style: +0.0 Validity: INVALID >"And this is JGOO, signing off. Harlequin will be taking it from here." > >"Thanks, John. This is Harlequin, soaring high above Acme Arena in the giant >Goodwill Zeppelin...Anyway, it looks like another team is mounting the >field, in the east, and ... hmmm, where's the monster? According to my >documents here, the Mad Scientist in question is "M.B. Eddy," and it lists >the following resource: > > http://www.ultrasite.com/csindex/ > >But where is the monster? Aaahh...here it comes: it's a huge building! My >paper lists it as: > > C.S. Mon*tor > ^ > s > >It's a nice building, too, nice glasswork. It seems to be plodding -- how >does a building plod? -- plodding towards the center of the field. It's >reached the field just in time to see the Tentacles drive home the first >point of the game against Dolly, putting the score at 1/1/1/1/0. > >The ball has been returned to the center of the field, and...the tentacles >are off, easily controlling the ball through sheer force of numbers. Trying >to take advantage of its sluggish movement, the tentacles are headed towards >the CSM's goal...they're getting close, and it looks like the CSM is unable >to prevent the score... > >but what's this? The monster has suddenly launched a huge stack of newspaper >towards the ball! Hitting it just as a tentacle took a shot at the goal, the >ball's been sent spinning in a completely different direction, to head >directly towards Doctor Fred's goal! Oh, what an upset! Ahhh, and here's >celebrity commentator M. Shelley >(http://www.primenet.com/~huxleyan/mws_web.htm) to talk more about this >tournament, and the origins thereof... and she's just the first! Because, we >have a whole slew of celebrity commentators lined up for you! In fact, each >future rule will include some comments by one of them! Now, back to you, >Mary..." Ok, despite some problems I have with the Rule, it's VALID. Ok, I am docking a Style point for every rule that does not take the ball's shape/size/number into account. (You pay attention to # of tenticales, why not the # of "balls") I'm also docking half a point because there's no restriction in the rule. (Other than implying the commentator for the next rule) However, there's a point worth of amusement value here, and there's another half point for including the score. So, a wash, STYLE = 0.0 ---- later ---- [This message initially bounced due to a too long header line, probably the To: line, I moved some of it into a Cc:. (Why should 3 addresses be too long I ask.) - Oerjan] [snip] I've decided that this rule is actually INVALID. It was brought to my attention that this rule _is_ inconsistent with 74:2, in that it scores for five teams when 74:2 explicitly calls for four. Sorry. Since this was an oversight by the Judge I'm not making any changes to the Style. Swann Rule: 74:6 Poster: William Maciejewski Style: +1.5 Validity: >This is Theodore Thacklethorpe, back with you after a prolonged commercial >break. I hope you didn't miss that last commercial, but in case you did, >let me reiterate: The X-Files, on Fox, 9pm EST Sunday nights. See their >web page for more info: http://www.neosoft.com/sbanks/xfiles/xfiles.html >It seems that the previous fourth team, Dr. Eddy and his monstrous >building, were disqualified in the opening quarter of the game, so the >backup fourth team is now entering the field. >The new team seems to be made up of a Dr. Schizosuto (a two-foot tall midget, >of all things) and what looks to be a flying tangerine-colored turkey vulture! >They're coming on strong, as the vulture grabs both cloned spheres from the >grasp of Dr. Fred (thereby ruining his chance to make a goal), narrowly >avoiding a swipe from the invisible demon, and flying directly through Dolly >and Ian's goal! >Score one for each other team. Here's the current standings: > Dolly and Ian: 0 > Maxwell and Demon: 1 > Fred and tentacle: 1 > Schizosuto and vulture: 1 >But wait! The demon, enraged by the near miss, is swatting at the vulture! >It looks like the vulture could be injured! The demon, unmindful of this, >grabs the balls and is lunging towards Schizosuto's goal! > >The game is getting bloody... all future rules will detail a replacement >to an injured team member (either a Doctor or Monster), but remember - >players will not kill each other! (never said maiming was out of the >question) :) >-bill Ok, it obeys 74:1 with no problem. It follows 74:2 by describing a team and an inital game action for it, (and it has the correct number of teams) It follows 74:3's requirement of a weblink for any refrence to a real thing object &c. It has 74:4's requirement of a unique attempt at a goal, as well as explaining the outcome of the goal attempt in the prior valid rule (which was 74:4). The refrence to replacement players I don't take as inconsistent with 74:1's definition of "teams" since it's usual, when stating the number of players in a sport, to only count those on the field when the game's on. It's VALID. (Oh in answer to bill's question: I read "unique goal" in 74:4 as meaning the Rule has to contain a goal attempt not described in a prior Rule. I don't take it to meant that there's only one such attempt per rule.) I like the maitinance of the sportscaster conceit (BTW upon a re-reading of 74:3, the refrence to real things isn't required, it just insists that if you refrence a real thing you include a weblink to it, I think my comments after that Rule might have mistated its effect-- sorry, I'm new :) and I like the fact that the rule actually pays some attention to the sadly INVALID 74:5 when it didn't have to. It has the score, pays attention to the state of the ball, and it has a rather livid restriction to future rules. About the only thing it doesn't have is a special ability/equipment that 74:1 implies-- but that isn't a real deficit, since they might not have used it yet:) STYLE=1.5 Rule: 74:7 Poster: Joshua Hall-Bachner Style: +1.5 Validity: VALID >"Here in the Zeppelin, it's Ricardo Roberts, taking over for Theodore >Thacklethorpe. And, boy, has the game heated up tonight. Right now Maxwell's >Demon is swerving towards Dr. Schizosuto's goal, over the tentacles, over >Dolly...pow! pow! It's let off two rapid-fire shots into the net, putting >the score at: > > Dolly and Ian: 1 > Maxwell and Demon: 2 > Fred and tentacle: 2 > Schizosuto and vulture: 1 > >Now, a time-out has been called because, just moments after entering the >arena, Dr. Schizosuto's vulture was taken down by Maxwell's Demon, and it >looks like it's gonna be out permanently. Looks like this spot is bad luck, >since we've had two teams disqualified in it already! > >In light of this, it seems Dr. Schizosuto is bowing out, leaving the space >open for another team. Remember, everyone, that scores carry over to >substitute teams. And... our substitution is here. My sheet says the new >team consists of "Dr. Mung-Mung & Tongue-Tongue." > > > >By the way, our celebrity guest has been delayed a bit but our report tells >us she'll be here within five rules. > >Our new contestants are mounting the field... I see a short, bald man, the >picture of a Mad Scientist, and ... holy crap, what is that? Ladies and >gentleman, his Monster is a giant Tongue-Man! Well, now we've got the >face-off... and Tongue-Tongue is off! It's grabbed both spheres and is >slowly slobbering towards Dr. Fred's goal. Can it make it there without >having the ball intercepted? > >The tentacles are surrounding Tongue-Tongue, and they're leaping at it... >Viewers, Tongue-Tongue is collapsing! I guess the taste of toxic waste was >too much for its finely-tuned taste center. Oh, the fourth team spot is not >doing well tonight! > >It looks like the Demon and the Tentacles have teamed up -- the demon has >grabbed one of the spheres, and the tentacles the other, and they're taking >opposite routes around the arena, towards Mung-Mung's goal. Can >Tongue-Tongue get up and stop the goal?" > >Since these two teams have broken the ground, future rules will also include >at least one instance of two teams working together. Obeys 74:1 fine (and avoids the obvious mistake of scoring for each sphere) and the score's right. 74:2's restriction no longer applies since it's been three valid rules since. It has 74:3's weblink for "real" entities. It has 74:4's requirement for a unique goal attempt, and the outcome of the prior attempt. 74:6 says a rule must replace a doctor or a monster, but it doen't say you can't replace both, so the injury replacement of the whole team seems fine. VALID. A Tick refrence is worth at least as much as a Maniac Mansion Refrence:) I like the mention that scores carry over, 74:1 implied it, but it's nice to have that specific. The restriction is nice too, anything that makes the ballgame more interesting is worth something. STYLE = 1.5 Rule: 74:8 Poster: William M. Maciejewski Style: +1.0 Validity: VALID >Thanks, Ricardo. This is Theodore Thacklethorpe, back in the commentator's >booth. We're about to go to the field for an exclusive interview with >our celebrity commentator, Mary Jo Pehl. (Check out the official homepage, >http://www.scifi.com/mst3000/thebrains/thebrains.html#pehl ). >You there, Mary Jo? > >Pehl: Hello, fans! I'm here on the field, chatting with Dr. Schizosuto, the > recently disqualified teammate of the vulture. Dr. Schizosuto, how is > your downed comrade? >Schizosuto: Ze vultur ees going to be meemed for life. I eem going to get > thet demoon. >Pehl: Thanks, Dr. Sch - Doctor? He's wandered off... wait! There he is! > He's pulling out some sort of contraption! He's firing some sort of bolts > at the invisible demon! The demon is down! It looks like Schizosuto has > some sort of incapacitating ray, and... ugh. The smell on the field is > horrible. Back to you, Thacklethorpe. > >This is a terrible smudge on the history of sports. I'm shocked at >this horrible violation of sportsmen's ethics. Dr. Schizosuto is >being escorted from the field by the refs, and will be fined >accordingly. Oh, wait. The action on the field has been going on all >this time. Let's recap: Demon and Tentacles were rushing towards >Mung-Mung's goal, the demon dropped his sphere when he was hit by >Schizosuto's incapacitating ray, and the tentacles scored. It wasn't >the whole ball, though, so the goal was ruled no good. > >In a short break in the action, Tongue-Tongue and the Mung-Mung's >replacements are coming onto the field. It's Dr. Kaf and his Amazing >Supercharged Caffeine Baby, and the Baby looks ready for action! The >Baby has picked up one of the spheres and the tentacles manage to grab >the other, and they're both driving towards the newly unoccupied >demon's goal! But wait! Time stops on the field as the ref steps out >to assess a two-minute penalty to the Baby, for Unsportsmanlike >Slobbering. According to the rules of the game, Dr. Kaf retains >possession of the ball, but without the help of his Monster. The >truncated teams are still driving towards the goal... > >Penalties abound! All future rules must contain some mention of referee >action. >-bill Ok Validity, 74:1 no problem. It has the obligitory web-link for "real refrences" ala 74:3. It completes the prior goal attempt and initiates a new one ala 74:4. It has replacements for injured team members ala 74:6. It has two teams working together as 74:7, as well as a celebrity guest. It it VALID. All in all a good rule, with a decent restriction STYLE = 1.0 Rule: 74:9 Poster: John M. Goodman II Style: +2.0 Validity: VALID >This JGOO bringing you the live play by play once again... >With the Tentacles and Dr. Kaf charging across the field, towards Maxwell's >undefended goal, things look bleak for his team. But it seems Maxwell is >choosing this moment to drop out in order to tend to his demon and find a >good lawyer to sue Dr. Schizosuto. Dr. Kaf's half of the ball has reached >the goal, but the Tentacles are still slightly behind (they may be numerous, >but they are not fast)... still there is nothing to stop--wait! >It seems Maxwell's replacement has arrived--a large spaceship has >landed--with the goal formerly belonging to Maxwell actually WITHIN the pod >bay. A man seems to be conversing nervously with the ship's computer. >Perhaps we can pick up their heated conversation on the parabolic mic as the >ball approaches the open pod bay doors, and the goal within. > >"Close the pod bay doors Hal." >"I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that." >Dave seems to be fuming over this monstrosity of a computer system. In a >last ditch effort he is diving through the pod bay doors, at the ball--but >to no avail. The tentacles have completed the goal, leaving the score at: > > Dolly and Ian: 2 > Dave and Hal: 2 > Fred and Tentacle: 3 > Kaf and Baby: 2 > >playing field has become dangerous. A monster of a computer, Hal 9000, who >has been known to kill, has joined the field. The owners of all teams and >of this arena are not responsible for injuries or deaths caused by Hal 9000. >For more information, see http://venus.ast.univie.ac.at/Stud/SF/WS95/film1.html> > >The Baby rejoins the field, his penalty having ended, just as Hal finally >closes the pod bay doors (shortly after the ball is returned to play). Dave >has kicked half the ball far from his goal while the Baby has SAT on the >other half! The tentacles are fighting to extricate it while Ian dives for >the first half. All of them are pushing at this enormous baby--even Dr. >Fred is helping. >But wait--what's Dave doing? It seems he is stepping into Dr. Fred's >Chron-O-John while the Baby has the team distracted. > >This is amazing folks--the chron-o-john has powered up, disappeared and >re-appeared--and the tentacle (every copy of him) seems to have lost his >arms--AND his heightened intelligence. With no intelligence left to those >defending Dr. Fred's goal, Ian and Dolly maneuver their half of the ball >towards that goal, simultaneously un-cloning the ball, so they now control >100% of it. They seem to have a clear shot... > >There's only one explanation for what has happened--Dave has gone back in >time and stopped the tentacle from drinking the polluted water. Dr. Fred is >furiously stomping off the field, ignoring Ian and Dolly followed by an army >of unintelligent tentacle. I take it this is a forfeit. > >But, there's a flag on the play. Yes, it seems Dave has been penalized one >point for using another scientist's equipment! The refs certainly called >that one right. Now the score is > > > Dolly and Ian: 2 > Dave and Hal: 1 > Fred and Tentacle: 3 > Kaf and Baby: 2 I actually like this rule, it is amusing. However, I have to rule it INVALID due to 74:1, which says in part, "The teams are taking the field now, with each Monster being accompanied by its creator ^^^^^^^ and coach, a Mad Scientist. For those who are just tuning in, here are the rules of the game: 1. Each team is composed of one Monster and one Mad Scientist." Taken together, the definition of the Mad Scientist half of any team is the creator of the (or a) Monster. I don't think Dave qualifies. IMO 74:1 requires the inital appearace of a team to be Monster + Creator. Even though this Rule is INVALID, I do really like the attempt, and I like the creative use of other Scientist's equipment, and the uncloning of the ball. It wouldn't be half as amusing if it was valid. STYLE= 2.0 ---- later ---- Ok, you've all convinced me, I didn't want to invalidate that rule anyway. 74:9 is hereby VALID Rule: 74:10 Poster: Joshua Hall-Bachner Style: +1.0 Validity: VALID >"Hi, sports fans, this is Ricardo Roberts once again reporting from the >Goodwill Zeppelin! To recap what's just happened, an illegal attempt by Dave >Bowman to use the computer HAL as his Monster caused a minor setback in the >game -- and Dr. Fred was illegally disqualified! However, Dave's entry to >the Tournament has been shown to be illegal on a technicality. Therefore, >his team will be ejected from the game, and the refs have reset the score to >what it was before HAL set foot, er, landing pod on the field! > > > Dolly and Ian: 1 > Dave and Hal: 2 > Fred and Tentacle: 2 > Kaf and Baby: 1 > >This is a controversial call! Well, it looks like replacements are coming in >for *two* of our teams, since Dr. Fred and Dave Bowman have *both* been DQed >in the past five minutes! On Dr. Fred's side, I see Dr. Cerebrum, the Brain >the Size of Wisconsin, and his monster, ummm...Dr. Cerebrum, the Brain The >Size of Wisconsin. Evidently through experimental radiation techniques he >was able to transform himself into a giant brain on legs! And since he was >his own "creator," he's entering *himself* as a monster! Ladies and >gentlemen, I don't know about the legality of that entrance...and...what?... >Yes, I'm assured we'll have a ruling on the legality of H. Cerebrum's entry >by our next rule... and the replacement for Hal's team doesn't seem to be >here yet. > >The game is starting up again... We're at the face-off...wham! Dr. Cerebrum >has leapt towards the ball, grabbing it and tumbling towards Dr. Kaf's goal. >Faced with this unstoppable menace, Kaf and Ian seem to have temporarily >allied... the Baby has leapt at Cerebrum, and just as the huge child reaches >the brain, Dolly has cloned the ball once again! Grabbing one sphere, the >baby has begun to waddle towards Hal's goal. Meanwhile, Ian has snuck up >behind the still slightly stunned Cerebrum and grabbed the other half of the >ball. WHAT A GAME!" > >Because of Dr. Cerebrum's registration, the next five valid rules will each >mention a seeming exception to one of the five rules of the Monster >Tournament listed in 74:1. Ok, I suppose this follows 74:1 by the same logic that allowed two "balls" and multiple "tenticles." Assuming Dr. Cerebrum is a invention of the author, 74:3 doesn't require a web link. Hmm, I suppose this rule can be said to explain the "outcome" of the prior goal attempt. (luckily I reconsidered the validity of 74:9, because 74:4 refers to the prior _valid_ rule) 74:6 req. the rule to detail replacement of an injured team member... replacing Dr.Fred and his "unintelligentized" Tenticle count. You have teamwork and referee action. I think that's it. VALID. I like the restriction, especially since a lot of the Rules we already have seem to follow it :) STYLE = 1.0 Rule: 74:11 Poster: Ed Murphy Style: +1.5 Validity: INVALID >"This is Arnold Rimmer's hologram [eyes flick briefly upward at the H on > his forehead], reporting for BBC 4 on the First Annual Monster Tournament > now in progress. > > Dave + HAL's replacements have arrived - according to the registration > form I've just been handed [tries to pick up paper on desk; grumbles as his > hand goes through it], this is Ford Prefect and Marvin the Paranoid Android > ['http://www.megadodo.com' and 'http://www.vogon.com/megadodo/' flash on > bottom of screen in quick succession], and I note that neither of the boxes > next to 'Did you create this Monster?' are checked... well, that'll have to > be settled soon enough, but until it is, the team will be considered legal. > > Let's go now to Camera 17, just behind what is now Ford and Marvin's goal... > > Ford: Defend the goal, Marvin. > Marvin: Sigh. Brain the size of a planet, and it's 'Pick up that piece > of paper, Marvin. Defend the goal, Marvin.' I really don't > know why I go to all the bother. > > ...and as we return here to the studio, Marvin has just picked Dolly up by > the scruff of the neck, ignoring Ian's attempts to pull his leg off. So > much for *that* scoring attempt. > > Meanwhile, it appears that Ford has made his way to the edge of the field, > and appears to be engaged in a drinking game with one of the referees - > wait, the referee has just turned on his mike, and is declaring legal Dr. > Cerebrum's attempt to enter himself as his own Monster. > > Now Marvin is removing a device entitled 'Portable Infinite Improbability > Drive' from what would normally be called his chest. He's pushing some > buttons on it... and Dr. Cerebrum has been turned into a second ball! This > is potentially two violations at once, but all the referees are too busy > keeping the drunk one from falling down to do anything about it. Well, we > have precedent that it's all right in one sense at least, but the > forthcoming referee decision is final. > > Having exhausted Ian and Dolly, Ford and Marvin have removed the halves of > the, ah, original ball... they're going for Dr. Cerebrum's effectively > undefended goal, but Dolly manages to butt Ford from behind, and he lands > face-down with his half halfway into the goal! My, but the judiciary is > being kept busy this round. > > Ian and Kaf, meanwhile, have snuck up on the PIID (left behind by Marvin) > and are pushing buttons wildly on it! Does this count as 'equipment > available to them'? Only time will tell - but I've just received word from > the head referee [camera cuts briefly to a giant head with a referee's cap] > that there'll be a ruling on all these things within three rules. Let's > hope they can stick to their promise..." Ok, Validity... 74:1, ok. 74:3 ok. 74:4 ok. 74:6-- we have an "injury" but I don't think the replacement of Hal and Dave qualifies, because Hal and Dave weren't ever injured, just disqiualified. So I'm afraid the rule's INVALID. Style, I like the attempt to ballify Dr. Cerebrum ;) STYLE=+1.5 Rule: 74:12 Poster: William Maciejewski Style: +1.0 Validity: INVALID >We're back folks, with more exciting action here at the newly renovated >Acme Arena. Once again, this is Theodore Thacklethorpe, broadcasting from >the press box. It looks like Dr. Cerebrum is still in the shape of a giant >ball, and Ian and Dolly are experimenting with Marvin's PIID. What's going >to happen next? >The referee seems a bit confused. It seems they've declared Ford and Marvin's >half-goal as just that, and a half point goes to all teams except Ian and >Dolly's. This is certainly an odd occasion, with game rulings being made >seemingly arbitrarily... and it's in direct opposition to their previous >ruling in Rule 74:8! The referees are in conference to decide whether or >not to allow Dr. Cerebrum to actually be a ball, and whether he wants to or >not. For some strange reason, however, they haven't stopped play for their >conference, and all sorts of things are going on while their backs are >turned! >Here are the current game standings: >Dolly and Ian: 1 >Ford and Marvin: 2.5 >Dr. Cerebrum and Dr. Cerebrum: 2.5 >Kaf and Baby: 1.5 >After the "successful" goal on Dolly and Ian, they of course gain control >of the ball. Ian presses a final button on the PIID while picking up the >ball, and suddenly - whump! - all the fans on the west side of the stadium >have suddenly turned into rainbow-colored penguins! My, there'll probably >be some sort of class-action suit after this game! On the field, the Baby >has suddenly grabbed Dolly, seemingly thinking she's some sort of chew toy, >and has placed her head in his mouth! This is too horrible to watch! >Wait, everybody else on the field (except for Dr. Cerebrum, who isn't able >to do much except roll around right now), and a couple of the penguins, are >trying to get the undisciplined Baby to relinquish its hold on Dolly! >Ah, they've finally gotten Dolly out, but she seems somewhat shaken up. >Dolly and Ian are going to the bench to be replaced by Ascii Boy and his >Dog of Doom (see http://http://www.cis.ksu.edu:80/~trm/doom.html). It seems >that young Ascii Boy spent too much time playing computer games, and he built >a computer mind-link between him and his dog that allows them to communicate >telepathically! >But wait! While the others are distracted by the new entry, Dr. Kaf has >picked up the balls (since he wasn't too worried about Dolly anyway) and >is heading straight for Dr. Cerebrum's goal! The field is wide open! > >There are only twelve seconds left in this period. It's almost time for our >exciting halftime show! Our next rule will detail that as well as some of >the game action. Stay tuned! > >-bill I have to rule this INVALID on a technicality. 74:4 requires a rule to explain the outcome of the goal attempt in the prior VALID rule-- in this case it is 74:10 which is an attempt by baby and Ian. (The referees arent the only ones confused) STYLE=1.0, the narritive, at least, is continious. ---- end file ----